Wednesday, 1 August 2018

Starting August off with a flop

Hey everyone! Happy August 1st! August already, can you believe it? I certainly can't. I'm already starting to decide what my kids Halloween costumes are going to be this year because the months are just flying by. I honestly felt like I'd be able to start this month off totally fresh and with new perspective but it's not even the end of the first day and already I've flopped.

I don't know how much more of the school holidays I can take and it's only the first week. Vala has been on my nerves all day and I'm already at breaking point. As Flynn napped this afternoon, Vala nagged and nagged about going out for a walk. I kept telling her she had to wait. Once Flynn was awake, I got him, myself and Vala ready to go out. Well, mostly got us ready. All that was left to do was brush Vala's hair, get my shoes on and put Flynn in his pram. Sounds simple enough right? Nope! For you see, while I was changing and dressing Flynn, Vala decided to start doing some colouring. Once Flynn was dressed, I put him back down in his cot while I went to finish getting Vala and myself ready. I sat beside Vala and asked her to stand in front of me so i could do her hair. She refused and then started throwing a massive tantrum because she didn't want to stop colouring. So I said fine, keep colouring we won't go out. That made the tantrum worse. She wanted to both colour and go out. It ended up this whole ordeal with her losing TV time and me deciding I can't face going outside now because I'm super stressed out, finding it difficult to not let my PND get the better of me and I don't want to deal with my child throwing more tantrums while we're out (which she has done every single time we've taken her out lately).

Anyway, by the time she had calmed back down and let me brush her hair, Flynn had fallen back to sleep in his cot. The whole ordeal has left me feeling like a lousy mother yet again because Flynn was so bored he went back to sleep and Vala has been so naughty lately that it feels like I'm doing something wrong. That somehow I'm raising her wrong. Writing this post has given me the opportunity to calm down and gather my thoughts and now I am going to attempt to get the kids to the supermarket as Jordan's at work an extra hour today, so I don't want him having to do the shop on his way home. I am honestly dreading this because I feel like Vala has another tantrum lined up for me in the middle of the supermarket but I've gotta soldier through this. Just wish I could've started the month off feeling more positive opposed to feeling like a failure again. Oh well, there's always next month.

Until next time,
Alli xo

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